Muggle Money
by JacquelineHyde114
Summary: Sirius will make James and Remus do ANYTHING to get his beloved motorcycle
1. A Trip to the Mall

_Disclaimer – I own nothing you may recognize. I'm sure you all figured that out._

_Author's Note – Just a few things. First of all, this is one of the first stories I ever wrote…ergo it was written a few years ago and I really think my writing style has changed some in the past few years…at least I hope. Secondly, I have published this story before, but I redid it because a lot of the lines didn't make sense because I didn't make it clear when time had passed. Thirdly, I have absolutely NO idea how much cookies cost in England. I don't know if £3 is too expensive of too cheap for a cookie. _

"A Muggle mall? Prongs, I thought you said we were going somewhere fun!" 19-year-old Sirius Black complained to his best friend.

"Muggle malls are fun!" James told him. "Lily brought me here last week and we had a blast-"

"Oh, so you brought us here because it reminds you of Lily. Now I understand." Sirius said as they walked inside.

"No, I honestly think you guys will enjoy it." James said. "There are all sorts of interesting Muggle things like...like…televisions! And…er…"

"Yeah, I'm gonna be bored. Hey there's food!" Sirius practically darted to the small stand where a woman was selling freshly made chocolate-chip cookies.

"Maybe we should get Padfoot a leash before we venture forth into the unknown." Remus commented as he and James snickered at Sirius.

"Can I have a cookie?" Sirius asked.

"Of course. £3." She said.

"Er…what?" Sirius asked, confused.

"One cookie is £3." She repeated. Sirius turned to James.

"What's £3?" He whispered.

"Here." James handed the woman some Muggle money.

"Muggle money is so strange!" Sirius announced as they walked deeper into the mall.

"Padfoot, I'm gonna just come right out and ask. Can I have a bite of that cookie?" Remus practically begged.

"Hey, you didn't pay for it." Sirius said as he took a particularly large bite.

"Neither did you!" James told him.

"So?" He asked taking another bite.

"Please?" Remus asked again. "Come on, full moon was last week! I haven't recovered." He added in a falsely weak voice.

"Ok, fine. But only because I owe you 2 Galleons." He broke off a piece of cookie.

"You do?" Remus asked.

"Er…no…" Sirius said and handed the piece of cookie to Remus.

"Hey guys, let's go in here!" James pointed to a shop called Spencer's Gifts.

"Woah…look at all the lights!" Sirius stated in awe as they walked into the store.

"Padfoot, I want those 2 Galleons." Remus told him.

"No way! I just gave you a piece of my cookie. That was like giving you a piece of my soul." Sirius said as they looked around.

"Hey Moony try these on!" James handed him a huge pair of red sunglasses.

"Why?" Remus eyed them questioningly.

"Because I think you'd look funny." James answered. Remus put them on and James and Sirius howled with laughter. Remus joined in as soon as he got a good look at himself in the mirror.

"I think Padfoot should try these on." Remus handed Sirius a pair of large green sunglasses with peace signs on either side. They spent the next half hour trying on every pair of sunglasses Spencer's had to offer. Finally the assistant manager got fed up with their hanging around without buying anything (and Sirius' laugh) so he told them to either buy something or leave. Walking out of Spencer's, they tried to decide where to go next.

"There's this one store full of incense, and then there's another Lily and I went to to see if there was anything she wanted for her birthday, then there's this one with a lot of clothes, I think it was called Millard's or something…"

"I've actually been needing to get some more Muggle clothes. I have about 2 pairs of pants that I've had since I was 15 and about 3 shirts. Other than that, all my clothes are normal." Sirius said.

"I'm open to any ideas." Remus said.

"Do you guys want to head to the clothes place?" James asked.

"Sure." Sirius said.


	2. Love at First Sight

"Padfoot, I think you had way too much fun in there." James remarked.

"But I look so good!" Sirius said, now clothed in an entirely new wardrobe. "Thanks for loaning me the money by the way. I'll pay you back."

"You don't have any Muggle money. Just be assured that you won't get anything for your birthday." James said.

"You love shopping for me and you know it."

"Don't be so sure." James checked his watch and gasped. "It's almost 2! We need to go! I told Lily I would pick her up at 3:30 for a movie and dinner!"

"Prongs, calm down." Remus told him.

"Yes, deep breaths…good Prongs. Deep breaths…" Sirius advised.

"You still have an hour and a half." Remus said.

"Yes, but I have to go home and shower and change and fix my hair and-"

"You don't have to worry about your hair." Remus commented.

"Yeah. It doesn't matter what you do because nothing ever works!" Sirius said. "How long did we try to make his hair lie flat before that dance in 6th year?"

"5 hours and 39 minutes." Remus replied, looking as though the memory gave him a headache.

"You guys timed that?" James asked.

"Yes and if memory serves, it didn't make the slightest bit of difference." Sirius said.

"You both are just…sad." James said.

"You know what's even sadder? We put in all that time, blood, sweat, and effort and _you didn't even have a date to that bloody dance!_" Sirius told him.

"Not for lack of trying. I must have asked Lily to go with me about 10 times."

"17." Remus corrected.

"You counted that as well?" James asked, thunderstruck. "What else have you kept track of?"

"More than we care to share Prongs." Sirius said. "I think I still have that list packed away somewhere…"

"What did I do to deserve 2 of the world's biggest gits in the world as best friends?" James muttered.

"I'm glad to know you appreciate us so much, Prongs." Remus smiled as they stepped out into the sunlight.

"Almost as much as I appreciated Snivellus." James told him. He turned and noticed Sirius was staring open-mouthed at something. "Padfoot, are you ok? Padfoot?"

"Huh?"

"Are you ok?" Remus asked. Sirius nodded slowly.

"What are you staring at?" James asked.


	3. Job Hunting

"I have never seen anything so beautiful in my life! Imagine how I would look-"

"For Heaven's sake Padfoot, it was just some Muggle bike. Get over it." James snapped. They were lounging at James' apartment swigging Butterbeer. It was nearly a week later and Sirius was still going on about the gleaming black motorcycle that had caught his eye in the parking lot of the mall.

"I will not get over it. I need one of those. I just need one. I have to have one of those motorcycles." Sirius said.

"Padfoot, this is just silly. You're completely obsessed with something you saw for about 5 seconds. This is not healthy." Remus told him.

"You guys don't understand! I've never wanted anything this badly before."

"Wow, he used proper grammar. He must be desperate." James joked.

"Padfoot, how do you intend to pay for one of those? You don't have any Muggle money." Remus said. Sirius considered this and then looked at James.

"Prongs, you're my best friend in the whole world."

"Padfoot, do you have the slightest idea of how much one of those costs?" James asked.

"No. Do you?"

"No, but I'm betting they're worth a lot more than what I have in Muggle money." James said.

"We can ask Lily how much they cost." Remus suggested.

"A brilliant idea Moony my friend!" James practically jumped up and picked up the phone that Lily had given him.

"Hello Beautiful…I'm fine, how are you my love?...Good. Listen, I have a question. How much would you say a Muggle motorcycle costs?...Because finding out is the only way we'll get Padfoot to shut up…Yes, he's still obsessing over it…I know he's pathetic…_How_ much?...Oh dear. That's a lot…Ok, thank you Lovely…How do you suggest he make that kind of money?...Yes…Brilliant! But where do we begin?…Of course! I would love to see you!...They don't have to stick around…Ok, I'll see you in a few minutes. I love you." James smiled gleefully as he hung up. "Lily's coming over.

"Yes, we figured that out when you said 'They don't have to stick around'." Sirius said. "So what did she say?"

"A motorcycle is very expensive and she suggests getting a part-time Muggle job." She said.

"Like what?" Remus asked.

"That's why she's coming over, to help us figure that out." James answered.

As soon as Lily arrived, she began going over ideas for them to make money.

"You could have a garage sale. Those are always quite effective, though a lot of work I will admit. Then of course you could have a car wash. I always had a lot of fun whenever my church held car washes during the summer. Or how about baby-sitting? Parents are always looking for an opportunity to-"

"Baby-sitting? Lily, please tell me you're joking."

"I'm not joking Sirius. There are some decent-paying jobs out there."

"Yeah, but what parents are going to trust us with their kids?"

"I'm sorry, I must have misunderstood you…us?" Remus asked.

"Yes, us." Sirius said.

"What makes you think we want to help you?" James asked.

"Because I know you guys, and you won't make me go through this alone." Sirius said.

"But _you're_ the one willing to give up life and soul to buy the stupid thing." James pointed out.

"But it won't be any fun without you guys." Sirius whined.

"No one said working would be fun so tough beans." James told him. Sirius pulled a puppy dog face and stared at James with big brown eyes. "Oh come on. Don't give me that." He said. Sirius turned to Remus, with the same pathetic expression.

"Padfoot, this is something you've got to do on your own." He said.

"Please?"

"No." James snapped.

"_Please?_"

"No." Remus said firmly.

"_PLEASE_?"

"NO!" James and Remus shouted together.


	4. Babysitting!

"Why did we let him talk us into this?" Remus asked James.

"Or rather how did we let him talk us into this? I was so sure that we had finally learned to say no to him. I mean, it was 2 against 1…" James trailed off as Sirius rang the Dawson's doorbell. A man answered the door.

"Hello. Mr. Dawson I presume?" Sirius said.

"Yes, and you must be those boys Andrea was telling me about. The ones on the fliers."

"Yes, that's us." Sirius smiled.

"Well, come in, come in. Andrea! The baby-sitters are here!" He called upstairs.

"Wonderful! Hang on a second, I'll be right down." Seconds later, a woman appeared and held out her hand to shake each boy's hand. "Hello, I'm Mrs. Dawson."

"I am Sirius Black, and these are my good mates James Potter and Remus Lupin."

"It's nice to meet you all. Now how old are you?"

"James and I are 19 and Remus here is 18." Sirius said.

"Very good. Now how much experience have you had with baby-sitting?" She asked.

"I baby-sat my little brother when I was younger." Sirius said, neglecting to mention the fact that he had transfigured Regulus into a rather large muskrat.

"Alright, well, I suppose you want to meet the kids." Andrea said.

"There's more than 1?" James hissed at Sirius.

"Kids, I would like you to come and meet your new baby-sitters!" She called. 2 boys and a girl came into the room.

"Who are they?" Asked the youngest boy.

"This is Sirius, James, and Remus. They're your new baby-sitters."

"You have funny names." The other boy commented.

"Jonathan! That is very rude! Apologize!" Andrea scolded.

"Sorry." He said, not sounding very sorry at all.

"Ok, this is Jonathan, he's the oldest, 10 years old. This is Sarah, she's 8. And Henry here is 4." Mr. Dawson said.

"They haven't eaten supper, but you can order a pizza or make Macaroni or something. They can watch TV until 9. Then it's up to brush their teeth and into bed. Don't worry about bathing them. Henry may want to go up a little earlier, so that's fine. Phone numbers are by the phone. Contact us should there be any emergency. Do you have any questions?" The boys shook their heads. "Ok, help yourselves to anything you want-"

"With all due respect Ma'am, you don't want to say that to Sirius. He'll clean out your cupboard faster than you can say 'junk food.'" James interjected.

"Well, in that case, help yourselves but please leave some food. Well, are we all set?" She looked at her husband.

"I think so." He replied.

"Now kids, be good. Please do what they ask you to." She kissed each of them on the cheek. "Good luck. Thank you so much." She said to the boys who nodded. "Good bye!"

"'Night." Mr. Dawson said and they left.

"She seemed eager to get away." James murmured.

"So kids, er…what are your names again?" Sirius asked.

"I'm, Jonathan, this is my sister Sarah and my brother Henry. You're not going to steal anything are you?"

"Er…no." Remus answered, quite taken aback.

"What are your names again?" Sarah asked politely.

"I'm Remus, this is James, and that's Sirius." Remus replied.

"Moony, you have a way with kids." Sirius said.

"I still think you should be a teacher." James said.

"Why did you call him Moony? Don't you know that's a name for someone's-"

"Yes we know." Sirius said quickly.

"Then why do you call him that?" Henry asked innocently.

"It's a nickname." Remus explained.

"Why?" Jonathan asked.

"He likes the moon." James lied. Remus stared at him.

"Right." He said blankly, though the kids seemed to miss the sarcasm.

"What are your last names?" Sarah asked.

"My last name is Black-"

"Like your hair!" Henry said adorably.

"Yes, like my hair. His last name is Potter."

"Potty!" Jonathan gave an obnoxious laugh.

"Potter." James corrected with gritted teeth.

"Don't you dare tell them my last name!" Remus glared at Sirius.

"What is it?" Now Jonathan looked excited.

"Lupin." Sirius answered.

"Padfoot!" Remus cried, feeling betrayed.

"Lupin! You're loopy!" Jonathan yelled with delight.

"As if I didn't hear that enough from Peeves." Remus muttered.

"You called him Padfoot." Sarah said.

"Yes, that's his nickname." Remus explained.

"Maybe we should just call each other by our real names. Our nicknames have got to be confusing." James suggested.

"What's your nickname?" Sarah asked sweetly. James nearly melted at the little girl's innocence.

"Prongs." He answered. Sarah giggled.

"You guys are weird. How did you come up with those nicknames anyway?" Jonathan asked.

"You know kid, I'm not sure I like your attitude." James said.

"James." Remus said with a warning tone.

"Sorry." James said.

"I like you guys. You're funny." Sarah said.

"Aww…thank you." Sirius grinned.

"So, what were you kids doing before? Or what do you like to do?" Remus asked them.

"We were watching TV." Jonathan said.

"That sounds simple enough." James said.

"But I'm hungry." Jonathan continued. James, Sirius, and Remus exchanged glances.

"Ok…what do you want?" Sirius asked.

"Macaroni!" Jonathan screamed.

"Kid, we're right here. You don't have to scream, we can hear you." Sirius said.

"Oh how the tables have turned." James remarked.

"Make us Macaroni!" Jonathan said again.

"Wouldn't you rather have pizza?" Remus asked.

"No! I want Macaroni!" Jonathan repeated.

"Me too please." Sarah said.

"Me too!" Henry smiled.

"Ok…sure…" Sirius said. "I think one of us should stay with the kids while they watch VT and the other 2 of us can make Macaroni."

"Did you say VT?" Jonathan eyed him strangely.

"VT…TV…Whatever." Sirius said. "Ok, now, who wants to stay with the kids? Or better yet, who has cooking experience?"

"I made Macaroni once." James said.

"Good enough. You're hired. Remus, you stay here with the kids. You're good with them." Sirius said.

"Ok…" Remus looked a bit unsure of what he was getting into.

"Come on, Loopy! Let's go." Jonathan said, heading into the living room. Remus turned and mouthed _help me_ to James and Sirius, who waved.

"So, you can make Macaroni, huh?" Sirius asked.

"Sure…I mean…How hard can it be?"


	5. Babysitting! Part 2!

"I thought you said you had made Macaroni before!" Sirius said.

"I did! Of course, well, Lily was the one actually making it, I was just observing."

"You filthy liar!" Sirius grimaced. "We can't feed this stuff to the kids. We'll kill them."

"It tastes like glue." James said, disgusted.

"I told you we put too much butter in!"

"We didn't! We put in just enough."

"Well, that was a lot for a fourth of a cup!" Sirius snapped as they heard someone yelling from the den. Remus rushed into the kitchen a few moments later.

"Hey guys? Are you almost done with that Macaroni? The kids are getting kind of…out of control." He panted. His light brown hair was plastered with splotches of blue and red paint. James and Sirius laughed at their friend's panicked expression.

"Yeah, Moony, do you want to try this Macaroni and see how it tastes?" Sirius held out a spoon with a few noodles in it.

"Sure." Remus tasted it and immediately started choking. "My word! What did you do to it?"

"We don't know!" James said honestly.

"I think he added too much butter." Sirius said.

"Well, we are not giving that to the kids. I don't want their parents to come home to find them all throwing up in the bathroom." Remus said.

"I propose we just order a pizza." Sirius said.

"First someone had better go in and tell the kids that they won't be getting Macaroni. And it won't be me." Remus said as they heard the kids approaching the kitchen.

"Hey Loopy! Where are you? We're still painting!" The kids entered the kitchen. "Potty, where's my Macaroni?"

"It's Potter, and I'm afraid you won't be having Macaroni."

"Why not?"

"Because quite frankly, it tastes like glue." Sirius explained.

"How would you know what glue tastes like?" Jonathan asked.

"Believe me, I know what more things taste like than you can possibly imagine." Sirius told him.

"Let me taste it!"

"No!" All three boys cried at once.

"Are you trying to poison us?"

"No, we're trying to keep you from getting food poisoning." James said.

"I would like some pizza please." Sarah said.

"Thank you so much." Sirius looked like he could have hugged her.

"Me too!" Henry agreed.

"Fine. But I'm watching you three, and if you do anything weird, you will have to answer to me and you'll be sorry." Jonathan said. The kids went back to the living room.

"Were we just threatened by a 10-year-old?" Remus asked, incredulously.

"A _Muggle_ 10-year-old." Sirius said in a tone that suggested that they were pathetic. James appeared to have other things on his mind.

"Hey Moony, how big a mess did you leave in there?" He asked. Remus paled.

"Er…well...one of the walls is completely splattered with paint." He said looking very nervous indeed.

"Great. The Macaroni's rotten and the den's a painting disaster. I don't think this job could possibly get any worse." Sirius said. At his words, a scream sounded from the den. James, Sirius, and Remus looked at each other before darting out of the kitchen and into the den where Sarah and Henry were standing on the couch and Jonathan was crawling on the floor looking for something.

"What's going on?" Remus asked.

"There's a really, really, really big bug!" Sarah squealed.

"Here it is!" Jonathan pulled out a large brown cockroach from under the coffee table and turned to his sister. "Here, wanna see it?"

"No!" She shrieked as advanced on her, holding out the roach.

"Hey, knock it off!" Sirius scolded.

"Do you wanna see it?" Jonathan asked him, now coming toward Sirius.

"No, I just want you to stop abusing your sister and – _don't you come any closer to me with that thing_!" Sirius was now backing up into James and Remus who were also trying to avoid contact with the disgusting insect.

"Why not? He won't hurt you." Jonathan said evilly.

"Now you listen to us, we're in charge and we're telling you to take that thing outside or kill it, right now." James said firmly.

"Are you three afraid of bugs or something?" Jonathan asked.

"Of course not. Just take it outside." James said.

"But if you're not scared of it, why don't you want it in the house?" Jonathan pressed.

"Well, we're not scared of you, but we don't particularly want you in the house." Sirius told him.

"Sirius!" Remus snapped. He turned to Jonathan. "Will you please just take it outside?"

"Why should I?"

"Because we're your baby-sitters and we're telling you to do it." James said.

"I don't have to do anything you tell me. I have free will."

"He sounds like a 10-year-old you." James said to Sirius.

"Will you please, please, please just take that nasty thing outside?" Sirius begged.

"Fine." Jonathan said. "Whoops." He pretended to trip and in doing so, threw the bug right at Sirius, James, and Remus. The roach landed on Sirius' chest, resulting in him crashing into James and the two of them landing right on top of Remus who collapsed under their weight. Jonathan howled with laughter while Sirius frantically tried to get the roach off his chest. He finally got it off of him, but it landed on James' arm and started crawling up toward his shoulder.

"Get it off!" He gasped. He started squirming uncontrollably, accidentally kicking Sirius in the back of his leg and nearly elbowing Remus in the face.

"Get off of me!" Remus wheezed. But James continued to squirm as the roach crawled into his sleeve, not allowing Sirius to get up.

"Agh! It's in my shirt! Get it out! Get it out!" Remus couldn't help but laugh, which made his situation even worse, as he could barely breathe. Sirius however, looked alarmed.

"James, stop moving you prat! You're going to-"

CRASH!

James had accidentally kicked a large expensive-looking vase which had shattered at the impact of his foot. Sirius stood up frantically and stared as all the color drained out of his face. Remus managed to heave James off of him and stood up as well. James was still desperately trying to get the cockroach out from under his shirt.

"Oh Merlin, it's about to crawl up my neck!"

"Ooh, you are going to be in a lot of trouble!" Jonathan said gleefully.

"Why did you say oh Merlin?" Sarah asked curiously.

"Because this roach is about to – Agh! Get it off! Get it off!" James practically shrieked as the roach crawled onto his cheek. Remus and Sirius couldn't contain themselves. Despite the fact that they had smashed a very expensive vase, both were doubled up, howling with laughter. "Don't! Stop! Just get it off!" James yelled at them. Remus looked around and found a magazine. He rolled it up and in one swift motion, whacked the roach off James' face. Sirius took up another magazine, threw it on top of the roach, and stepped on it. James stood up, his face red and his hair sticking up more than usual. "Thanks, I guess." He panted.

"You're welcome. But what are we going to do about the vase?" Remus whispered.

"Did anyone bring along their…you know…" Sirius asked, meaning their wands.

"I did." James said. "Are you suggesting…" He asked quietly.

"I don't see any other way." Sirius said.

"Right under their noses? Are you sure that's wise?" Remus inquired.

"What are you three muttering about? How to get back at us?" Jonathan asked loudly.

"We don't need to get back at your brother or sister, just you!" James said loudly.

"Jeez, no wonder their mum was eager to get away." Sirius remarked.

"So, do you want us to get them out of the room so you can…" Remus trailed off.

"Yeah, that sounds good." James said.

"But how do we explain it?" Remus asked.

"Just say that…a fairy fixed it, I don't know!" James said.

"It's either that, or suffering through this and not getting paid anything because we broke their vase." Sirius said. They looked at each other.

"No." They all said at once. They turned to the kids.

"Hey, why don't you show us your bedrooms?" Remus asked.

"Ok!" Sarah jumped off the couch and took his hand. Henry followed, but Jonathan stayed where he was.

"I think I'll stay in here, make sure you don't do anything strange." He said.

"Ok, then we give Sarah and Henry permission to do whatever they like to your room." Sirius said.

"Yay!" Sarah and Henry smiled with delight.

"Fine, I'll come too." He stomped off behind them. As soon as the five of them had disappeared upstairs, James took out his wand.

"_Reparo_." He said and in the blink of an eye, the vase was as good as new. He turned and looked at the wall. There was no harm in cleaning that as well. "_Scourgify_." And the wall was as clean as ever. It was then that he remember that the kids had not yet eaten, so he decided to order a pizza. Then he realized he had no clue as to how to order a pizza. He picked up the phone and called Lily. "Hello Darling."

"What do you want?" She asked teasingly.

"Well, we're over here at our first baby-sitting job and-"

"Oh how's it going?"

"About as smoothly as a Quidditch match during a hailstorm."

"That bad, huh?"

"It's been a nightmare! But I'll tell you all about it later. I was actually calling to ask, erm, how do you order a pizza?"

"You just call the pizza place and tell them what you want and what address to send it to."

"I don't know any pizza places!"

"Here, call this number. This is the place where I always get my pizza." She gave him the number.

"Thank you so much my love."

"Any time Sweetie. Oh, just be sure to ask the kids what they want before you order."

"I will. I love you."

"I love you too."

James hung up the phone to hear a loud, "Ooooooooooooooooooooooh! I love you! Who are you talking to? Your girlfriend?" Jonathan asked as they all walked back into the den

"She's actually my fiancée." James replied.

"What's her name?" Sarah asked.

"Lily Evans." James said wistfully.

"That's a pretty name." Sarah said.

"Yes, I think so too." James smiled. "So, what kind of pizza do you kids want?"

"Pepperoni!" Sirius called out.

"I asked the _kids_ what they wanted." James said.

"Hey, wait a second!" Jonathan said loudly. "What happened?"

"What?" Remus asked.

"You all broke that vase, but now it's fixed!"

"Well, would you look at that?" James said.

"And the walls are clean. How did you do that?" Jonathan demanded.

"I didn't. It must have been the Good Fairy." James said. Jonathan eyed him suspiciously.

"There's no such thing as fairies." He said.

"Now you don't know that." Sirius said. He, James, and Remus knew that there were in fact such things as fairies, just not the kind the kids were thinking of.

"I think there are fairies." Sarah said.

"And you're right." Sirius told her.

"No she's not! Have you ever seen a fairy?" Jonathan asked.

"Just because you've never seen something, doesn't mean it doesn't exist." Remus told him.

"You're too old to believe in stuff like that!" Jonathan told him.

"You're too young to not believe in it." Sirius retorted.

"I'm almost 11 years old! I'm almost as old as you are."

"There is a bit of a difference between 11 and 19, kid." Sirius said.

"Enough! What kind of pizza do you want?" James asked, exasperated.

"Cheese!" Sarah said adorably.

"Me too!" Henry said.

"I don't want cheese." Jonathan said.

"Then what do you want?" Sirius asked through clenched teeth.

"I don't want pizza."

"Too bad!" James said. "It's either pizza or you can lick that dead cockroach off of the magazine. Now what do you want?"

"I'll take cheese." He grumbled.

"Thank you." Sirius looked like he was about to crack. Not trusting the kids, James went outside to find out the address and then headed back inside to order the pizza. He then headed back into the den.

"I want to play a game!" Jonathan announced.

"What kind of game?" Sirius asked, dreading the answer.

"Chase! Or hide and seek! Or Keep Away!" Jonathan said.

"Or how about a nice, simple game, like chess?" Remus asked.

"Chess?" Jonathan asked. "Why would we know how to play that?"

"I've played for 15 years." Remus said.

"You must have had a boring childhood." Jonathan remarked.

"You know, I'm just about this close to shoving you up that fire place." James spat.

"I think we should play Keep Away!" Jonathan exclaimed.

"And how do you play that?" Sirius asked.

"Me and Sarah and Henry against you three. We have a ball and you try and get it away from us. Then if you get it, you try and keep it away from us."

"Ok, but we can't break anything." Sirius warned them.

"But won't the Good Fairy come and clean it up anyway?" Jonathan asked them with a huge smirk on his face.

"I wouldn't bet on it." James said.

"Ok, let's play!" Jonathan exclaimed.


	6. Babysitting! Part 3!

"How did we end up in here? Just explain that one little thing to me." Remus said, sounding desperate. He, James, and Sirius were stuck in a small dark closet, with a chair shoved up against the door on the other side, no doubt the work of Jonathan Dawson.

"We ran in here to hide and the little brat locked us in." Sirius said, defeated. "I am never having kids."

"I am a fully grown wizard, and I am stuck in a closet, at the mercy of some snot-nosed Muggle brat. Will one of you hold me?" James sounded on the verge of tears.

"Prongs, get a grip on yourself! Just think about the first time you won the Quidditch Cup for Gryffindor and you'll be fine." Sirius said.

"This is pathetic! I say we Apparate out of here and give that kid what's coming to him!" James said.

"Prongs, we can't Apparate! We've already used enough magic cleaning up that vase and the wall. They're suspicious and us appearing out of thin air will be enough to send them over the edge." Remus warned him.

"They've already sent me over the edge." Sirius muttered.

"We can use a Memory Charm on them." James said fiercely.

"No, we can't! Memory Charms are to be used responsibly, not for the smallest little thing. We just have to figure this out the Muggle way." Remus said. The doorbell rang.

"Ok, those kids have got to let us out now. The pizza's here." Sirius said. Sure enough, the door opened and Jonathan stood in a pool of light.

"Go get the pizza!" He ordered. "Come on!"

"You certainly are eager to get something that you didn't even want." Sirius told him. As soon as they had all eaten, James, Sirius, and Remus collapsed onto the couch, each completely exhausted.

"I want to play another game!" Jonathan declared.

"No!" James, Sirius, and Remus cried at once.

"Why not?"

"One: You just ate and you'll make yourself sick. Two: We're tired. Three: The last time we decided to play one of your games, _you locked us in a closet_!" Sirius growled.

"Isn't it about time for you to head up to bed anyways?" James asked hopefully.

"No. It's only 7:30." Jonathan said.

"No…" Sirius groaned. Now it was he who sounded on the verge of tears.

"Can't you just watch TV or something?" Remus asked wearily.

"I want to watch a movie." Sarah said.

"Which movie?" Sirius asked, not completely sure he remembered what a movie did.

"_King Arthur and the Sword in the Stone_." Sarah answered.

"Yeah!" Henry smiled.

"Is that alright with you, your majesty?" James asked Jonathan, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Fine." He said.

"Good." Sirius said.

"I'll go get it!" Sarah said happily. When she returned, she handed it to James to put it in. He stared blankly at it.

"Can't you put it in?" He asked.

"No." She replied.

"Hey you, put this in." Sirius said to Jonathan.

"I'm not allowed to because I broke our last one." He told them.

"Why am I not surprised?" Sirius muttered. "Hey Remus, can you put this in?" Remus, who was on the verge of falling asleep, looked up at him.

"What?" He asked.

"Will you put this in?" Sirius repeated. He leaned over and whispered, "I don't remember anything from Muggle Studies."

"Ok." Remus took the tape and stuck it in the VCR.

"You need to rewind it." Jonathan told him.

"I can do that!" James said as he punched the button on the remote. Sirius looked at him and James leaned over and whispered, "Lily taught me how to work these."

"Enough said." Sirius told him as Remus came and sat back down on the couch, looking ready to fall back asleep.

"Is he sick?" Sarah asked.

"No, he's just tired." James told her.

"How come?" Henry asked.

"Because your big brother chased us around the house for about 15 minutes before locking us in a closet." Sirius said as the movie began. When one of the characters was introduced as Merlin, James and Sirius gasped.

"What?" Jonathan asked, looking alarmed.

"Nothing." James said quickly.

"You guys are freaks." Jonathan commented before turning his attention back to the TV.

"You guys are freaks. Nyah." James imitated Jonathan in a not-so-flattering voice. Sirius, however, looked at Remus, who was fast asleep, his head turned slightly away from Sirius and James.

"Remus!" Sirius started poking his shoulder. Remus slowly opened his eyes and looked at Sirius.

"What?"

"Look! It's Merlin!" Sirius pointed to the "wizard" on the television screen.

"Fascinating." Remus said blankly. "Can I go back to sleep?"

"No! Stay awake!" Sarah told him. "Please? I want you to watch the movie."

"Ok, I'll try." He said honestly. As the movie progressed, James, Sirius, and Remus all exchanged smirks at the "magic" being performed by the Muggle actors throughout the movie. There was one point where they had to laugh out loud when Merlin said the words, "Abra Kadabra!"

"What's so funny?" Jonathan asked them suspiciously.

"Nothing." They all replied at once.

"We actually shouldn't find that funny because it sounds like…" Remus whispered.

"_Avada Kedavra_." James whispered seriously.

"True, but it's hilarious to see Merlin saying things like Abra Kadabra!" Sirius laughed quietly. About halfway through the movie, Jonathan turned around.

"I want popcorn!"

"No way." James said, not only because he thought it was too late, but he wasn't sure he wanted anymore adventures with Muggle cooking.

"Make me popcorn!"

"It's too late to make popcorn."

"Is not. It's only 8 something."

"Yeah, well like it or not you're going to bed at 9 and we don't want you to be up all night because of a full stomach. Right guys?" James looked to Sirius and Remus who were both either completely engrossed in the movie, or somewhere between earth and space, it was impossible to tell. "Right guys?" He repeated.

"Er…yeah…" Remus said, still staring at the TV screen.

"Whatever you say." Sirius said. James stared at them.

"Ok, no more TV for you guys."

"I want popcorn! NOW!"

"Too bad!" James said loudly while Sirius and Remus shushed them at the same time. "Come on guys, we're here to watch the kids! Not some Muggle dressed up as Merlin!" Sirius' and Remus' heads snapped to attention at those words and James paled. They stared at each other, each praying that the kids had missed James' slip of the mouth. They weren't so lucky.

"_What_ did you just call him?" Jonathan asked.

"Erm…I said…" James searched for the right word.

"He meant actor." Remus said.

"No, he said some funny word…Muggle."

"He accidentally combined two words." Remus lied quickly. "What he was trying to say was 'Not some man struggle to dress up as Merlin'. But he's tired and cranky so it came out Muggle." Sirius and James both sent him looks that said they were impressed. Jonathan still eyed them strangely.

"I still think you guys are weird. Now make me some popcorn!"

"No." Sirius said.

"Why not?"

"Because you're giving me a headache." Remus leaned back and rubbed his head.

"And because you don't even bother to say please!" Sirius snapped.

"Fine. PLEASE make me some popcorn!" Jonathan practically yelled.

"That please wasn't very sincere." James told him in a singsong voice.

"Please make me some popcorn." Jonathan said through gritted teeth.

"That still doesn't sound like you mean it." Sirius said.

"Will you please make me some popcorn?"

"You're still a little too forceful." James said.

"Please make me some popcorn."

"That sounded monotonous. You have to-"

"Just make him some bloody popcorn!" Remus cried, exasperated. James and Sirius stared at him, somewhat scared. They knew Remus sometimes had a shorter temper when he was really tired, but he rarely ever lost it. "Either that or stop antagonizing him! You're about to drive me crazy!"

"Sorry." Sirius said truthfully.

"Yeah, me too." James said. They both glared at Jonathan. "Don't you have anything to say?"

"Yeah – MAKE ME SOME POPCORN!"

"Ok kid, that's it. Either apologize and drop the popcorn thing, or go up to bed right now!" James practically shouted.

"But-"

"No buts! I've had enough of your bloody attitude! Get up right now!" James scolded.

"No!"

"Then be quiet and enjoy the movie." Sirius said.

"It's almost over." Jonathan told him.

"Oh, what a shame. I guess that means that you'll have to go up to bed then." James said.

"Thank goodness!" Sirius cried out, almost gleefully. Henry yawned.

"I'm tired. I want to go up." He said rubbing his eyes.

"Me too." Sarah said.

"Ok. Do you need one of us to come up with you?" Remus asked her.

"No. I can take care of Henry." Sarah answered. Before heading up, the two kids came over and hugged James, Sirius, and Remus. "I like you guys. You're fun." She smiled. All three of them were touched by her sweetness.

"Thank you for being so good for us." Sirius said as they all glared at Jonathan.

"Goodnight." She told them.

"'Night." James said.

"'Night." Sirius and Remus repeated. As Sarah and Henry headed upstairs, James, Sirius, and Remus turned to Jonathan.

"Will you be heading up then?" Sirius asked hopefully.

"Are you kidding? I still have 15 minutes!" He responded.

"And how do you intend to spend those 15 minutes?" Remus asked, almost scared to hear the answer. Jonathan pondered that question before looking up at them.

"I want a piggy-back ride!" He said.

"Are you kidding me?" James asked blankly.

"No! It'll be fun!"

"Yeah, for you." Sirius looked at him.

"Give me a piggy-back ride or I'll go wake up Sarah and Henry."

"Come on, don't do that." Remus pleaded.

"Then give me a piggy-back ride."

James and Remus looked at Sirius. "You got us into this." Remus told him.

"What? Me? Can't we draw straws or something?" Sirius asked.

"No." James spat.

"Why not?"

"Because we wouldn't be here if you weren't so bent on getting that dumb motorcycle." Remus said.

"And you're the strongest." James said as he rested back against the couch.

"But I'm tired." Sirius whined.

"So are we." James said.

"Give me a piggy-back ride." Jonathan demanded.

"Please just go up to bed." Sirius begged.

"Not until you give me a piggy-back ride!"

"Padfoot, just give him a quick piggy-back ride and then he'll go up to bed. Right?" James glared and directed his question at Jonathan, who nodded.

"Yep."

"Fine." Sirius groaned.

Finally, 20 minutes later, James, Sirius, and Remus were all back on the couch, all extremely tired, especially Sirius.

"And I thought studying for N.E.W.T.s was exhausting." Remus said. "I mean, even transformations are a piece of cake compared to this."

"And these were just Muggle kids! Imagine what it would be like baby-sitting wizard kids!" Sirius looked tortured at the very thought.

"At least it's over." James said, closing his eyes. "Oh, and Padfoot, be reminded that you are in debt to us for the rest of your life."

"I am, my dear friends. I most surely am." Sirius said, as he too closed his eyes. They sat in silence for a few moments. James thought both of his friends had fallen asleep before he heard Sirius ask, "So, what will our next job be?" Remus moaned loudly and James whacked his best friend with a pillow with all the strength he possessed.


	7. Back to the Drawing Board

"So, how was your first job?" Lily asked them the next day. They were all having lunch at James' house to plan out their next Muggle job. As one, James, Sirius, and Remus groaned. James hid his face in his hands, Sirius banged his head against the table, and Remus rubbed his forehead. Lily laughed. "Glad to know it went so well." She chuckled. They looked at her, and exploded.

"First it was the insults-"

"And the Macaroni-"

"And the paints-"

"And the roach-"

"Then James smashed a vase-"

"It was in my shirt-"

"Then they chased us-"

"Then in crawled onto my cheek-"

"And locked us in a closet-"

"Then they made us watch the movie-"

"And then they wanted popcorn-"

"And a piggy-back ride!"

Lily just laughed.

"I don't care if your children are the best-behaved angels in the world, well being related to James we won't have to worry about that, but still, I'm never babysitting them!" Sirius said.

"Yes you will, Godfather Padfoot." James told him.

"Never! And I am never having kids!"

"Well, no woman is desperate enough to marry you, so it's ok." James chuckled.

"You must not remember our Hogwarts days too well Prongs." Sirius told him.

"Why do you think he tried on so many clothes that day at the mall? That woman just wanted to see him in a variety of different wardrobes!" Remus said, looking a bit disgusted.

"And Padfoot's so vain he just can't say no." James glared at Sirius, who blew a lock of black hair out of his eyes.

"Ok, well, down to business." He said, not pausing to deny his vanity, "Any new ideas, Lily?"

"Yes, in fact. I was going to suggest a car wash."

"That may not be too bad." Remus looked thoughtful.

"What do we do?" James asked her.

"How much money do we make?" Sirius wanted to know.

"We can raise a lot of money, but we will need more than 4 people." She said.

"Ok, who would be willing to go through this?" James asked.

"I'm sure Frank and Alice wouldn't mind." Lily said.

"Great!" Sirius said. "What about Peter?"

"We can always ask him, but you know how he is these days." Remus said.

"Yeah, strange little bloke." Sirius said. "Who else?" They sat and pondered.

"How about Dung? I know he's not very reliable, but at least we could have another set of hands." James suggested.

"Yeah, that's good. I don't suppose any of our old Professors would be willing…" Sirius looked at his friends.

"I'm not sure they'd be thrilled to perform free labor just so Sirius Black could buy a motorcycle." Remus said honestly.

"Why? All the teachers loved me. And Dumbledore is still their boss-"

"I'm sure Dumbledore has much more important things going on in the Order than buying you a motorcycle." Lily said.

"And what do you mean all the teachers loved you? They were all jumping for joy the day we left!" James said.

"Oh, you know when they really like particular students." Sirius said.

"Is handing out detentions some freakish little teacher way of showing affection? Because then I would say that you were very loved indeed." James told him.

"They miss us and you know it!" Sirius said.

"Yeah, they miss our Quidditch skills. That's about it."

"No, we made them laugh. They have to miss us."

"They miss students like Lily and Moony! Students like us make them want to give up teaching!"

"Now Prongs that's harsh-"

"No, McGonagall actually told me that." Sirius, Remus, and Lily all laughed.

"That's hilarious." Remus grinned.

"She even said to me once, 'Why hasn't being friends with Remus Lupin had any effect on you?' I didn't let her know exactly how much he had had an effect on me." James said, meaning the Animagi transformations.

"I still can't get over how you did that under all the teacher's noses without anyone, especially Dumbledore, finding out." Lily looked amazed.

"I still can't get over how you finally gave in and agreed to marry James." Sirius teased.

"Well, he's cute." Lily shrugged. James blushed.

"You remain the only person who can make Prongs blush." Remus told her.

"I actually have some interesting stories I could tell-" Sirius began.

"Don't even _think_ about it Padfoot." James warned. Sirius gave an innocent grin.

"You know, not to change the subject, but how on earth did we get onto the topic of making James blush?" Lily asked.  
"I really don't know. I don't know how we get on half of the subjects that we discuss." Remus said.

"OK, back to the important subject: buying me a motorcycle." Sirius announced.

"Shall we rally up a team of car-washers?" James looked like he didn't want to be asking the question.

"That seems like the best idea we have at the moment." Lily said.


	8. Workin' at the Carwash

The following Saturday at 8:00 a.m., Sirius, James, Remus, and Lily, along with others they had convinced to help them, were standing in the parking lot of the same shopping mall where Sirius had first seen the motorcycle. Lily had gotten permission to hold a carwash in the parking lot and James, Sirius, and Remus had gotten people to volunteer to help them.

"So how much are we charging?" Sirius asked Lily.

"We don't charge Sirius." She told him.

"WHAT?" He yelped. "Then how the bloody heck are we supposed to make any money?"

"Believe it or not Sirius, Muggles will donate money if we do a good job." Lily told him. "I called a couple of my friends to tell them that we were doing this."

"Are they going to help or will they provide filthy cars?" Sirius asked.

"I think they're just providing cars, but once they see that you guys are working it…" She trailed off.

"Why do you say…wait a second." Sirius turned on her. "They aren't those girls we met down at the pool that one time are they?"

"Well, as long as you get donations does it really matter who it comes from?" Lily asked.

"Oh, Moony will love this." Sirius muttered. He strolled over to where Remus was filling up buckets with water. "Moony guess what?"

"You saw your motorcycle again."

"No."

"What then?"

"Remember when Prongs, you and I had that little sleep-over at Prongs' house?"

"Before 5th year? Yeah, why?"

"Do you remember going to that Muggle pool and meeting Lily's friends?"

"I actually hadn't until you reminded me."

"Well-" Before Sirius could speak the words, Remus whirled around and looked at his friend.

"_Don't_ tell me they're going to help us." Remus said.

"Well, I don't think they're going to help us…I think they are bringing their cars though." Sirius said.

"Oh, this will be fun." Remus didn't sound very enthusiastic. "Will you please keep your shirt on this time?"

"I'll try, but it's gonna get really hot later." Sirius said.

"I honestly don't think we have to worry about getting hot. We have plenty of water." Remus told him.

"Oy! Padfoot! Moony!" Sirius and Remus turned just in time to get faces full of water, courtesy of James with a hose.

"Prongs! I'm gonna kill you!" Sirius yelled, shaking his wet hair. Remus spit out a mouthful of water.

"As I said, we have plenty of water. And Prongs with a hose." Remus said.

"We'll get him later." Sirius said as their first customer pulled up.

As the morning progressed, they earned more and more customers. Some cars weren't dirty at all, some were so filthy one would assume they were a different color than what they were when they were clean. In fact, one rather large car which they had thought to be gray turned out to be white, then left without paying them at all, leaving them a bit annoyed. When noon rolled around and they all paused for lunch, Sirius was a bit disappointed to see they had not made as much money as he had hoped for. While the rest of their crew ate and relaxed, a saturated Sirius pulled James and Remus (who were both equally soaked) aside. "OK guys, we have not earned as much money as I would like so I have a plan!"

"Oh no, a Padfoot plan." James groaned.

"This can't be good." Remus said.

"What if we made a sign that said something like, 'Donations appreciated!' and I walked around with it in my mouth?" Sirius asked.

"I think that would look rather odd." James said truthfully.

"No! I meant as a dog." Sirius whispered.

"Are you mental?" James asked. "Suppose someone figured it out?"

"But no one knows what we are except for us and Lily." Sirius argued.

"Prongs is right, Padfoot." Remus said. "Remember, you aren't registered! You could get in trouble."

"But who could refuse a cute little dog?" Sirius asked.

"Well, quite honestly Sirius, you're not that little, nor are you cute." James told him.

"I'd go more with ferocious-looking actually." Remus said.

"You're one to talk Wolf-Boy." Sirius said.

"Moony does have a point though. You might scare Muggles, especially little kids." James said. "Let's face it; you're not exactly a cuddly poodle."

"You may scare some wizards as well since you bear such a striking resemblance to the Grim." Remus said.

"Another good point." James said.

"Hey guys. What's going on?" Lily came over and laced her fingers through James'.

"Sirius thinks it's a good idea to go running around as a dog with a sign in his mouth asking people for donations." James told her. Lily's green eyes widened.

"That's not a good idea, Sirius. You'd scare everyone out of their wits." She said.

"OK, I was just thinking of how we could get more donations." Sirius said. Lily looked thoughtful, then a bit embarrassed. "What?"

"Well, I can't believe I'm going to say this, but I do know how the female mind works, and you'd get a lot of donations if you went around holding a sign without…" She trailed off.

"Go on, say it." Sirius said.

"Without a shirt on." Lily finished.

"Moony already told me I'm not allowed to do that." Sirius glared at Remus.

"Well, I meant all three of you. None of you have bad bodies." She said.

"Especially James, huh Lily?" Sirius smirked. Lily blushed.

"I bet if you three held out signs on the side of the road advertising a car wash, you would get a lot more customers and donations." She said.

"Do I have to?" Remus asked.

"Come on Moony! It's not like we'll ever see these people again!" Sirius said.

"Well yeah…but…"

"You need more self confidence Moony." James told him.

"Hold on, when are those friends of yours coming?" Sirius asked Lily.

"I have no idea." She replied.

"OK, I'm sure we'll get large donations out of them." Sirius said.

"Especially if you agree to date them or something." Lily said.

"Do they remember us?" James asked.

"Oh yeah." Lily said. "They ask about you every time we talk."

"Not that I can say I blame them, but they need to get over us." Sirius said. "Besides, my heart belongs to another…" He added wistfully.

"Yeah, it's shiny and black and you can ride on it and it goes _vroom vroom_!" James said.

"If Padfoot ever does find a girl, I pity her because he'll love that motorcycle more than he loves her." Remus commented.

"Oh, I can make a list of all the reasons why I would pity her, and he being infatuated with a motorcycle is actually at the bottom of the list." James remarked.

"As much as I love standing here and being insulted, what do you guys think?" Sirius asked.

"I'm in." James said, smiling at Lily.

"Yeah, so you can show off your sexy body to Lily, right?" Sirius smirked.

"Padfoot, never say I'm sexy again." James glared at him.

"Never again." Sirius crossed his heart. "Moony, how about you?" Sirius could tell that his friend was doing some serious considering, so he said, "Keep in mind this is just one little afternoon. I put in years of work to help you, illegally I might add."

"Fine." Remus said, looking as though he was going to sincerely regret this.

"I'll go get the camera!" Lily giggled.

"WHAT!" All three gasped.

"You mean you're going to take pictures of us making total prats of ourselves in front of…everyone?" Remus looked horrified.

"Of course." Lily said with an innocent yet evil grin. She practically skipped off to find her camera.

"You know Prongs, for the first time in my life, I find myself having issues concerning you marrying her." Sirius told James.

"Memories, Padfoot my friend." James said.

"Don't you mean blackmail?" Remus asked.

"It's really not that bad, I'm sure plenty of guys do it." James said.

"Yeah, but it makes us seem kind of desperate, not to say that Padfoot isn't, but us standing on the side of the road, begging for money, with no shirts on, I don't know…it just seems kind of strange." Remus said.

"Oh well, if it works, I really don't care." Sirius said.

Lily's plan seemed to work fine until around 1:00 and it started getting unbearably hot.

"Can we just go back and wash cars?" Remus asked.

"Yeah, I'm beginning to think this was kind of a stupid idea anyway." Sirius mumbled. "Come on, let's go back to the hoses." As they made their way back to the carwash, Sirius suddenly gave a gasp, "On second thought, let's go back to the street."

"Why?" James asked.

"Because Lily's friends from the pool are here." Sirius hissed.

"I remember them!" James said. "They'll be happy to see you two." He smirked.

"I'm transforming now." Sirius said.

"No! What about me?" Remus asked.

"Er, you can hide behind me."

"That won't work. Maybe if we grab towels and sneak off to the bathroom or something we'll miss them." Remus said.

"We can do that." Sirius said. Very quietly, they sneaked behind a car that was getting ready to be dried. "Dung!" Sirius hissed to Mundungus, who was about to begin drying. "Dung!"

"Sirius, there you are mate. Listen, I was wondering if I could leave for just a few seconds, there's a bloke down in Knockturn Alley who just-"

"Not now! Get us some towels, will you?"

"But-"

"Come on, just get us some towels and you can leave, just make sure you come back! Without stolen goods please."

"Right. Thanks mate." He left to get towels, returning with small rags. Sirius rubbed his head.

"Thanks, but I was thinking more along the lines of beach towels, so we can hide under them." He said.

"Ohhhh…so who're you hiding from?"

"We'll tell you later, just go get us some real towels!" This time Mundungus returned with three beach towels. James, Sirius, and Remus were about to cover themselves and sneak out when Alice Longbottom appeared.

"Dung! What do you think you're doing? We need-" She stopped, spotting James, Sirius, and Remus on the ground, looking up at her from under their towels. "Do I even dare to ask…?" She started, eyeing them strangely.

"Shhh! We're not here!" Sirius told her.

"What on earth are you doing down there? Aren't you supposed to be helping? It is your carwash after all." Alice said.

"Alice, please! Stop talking to us! You'll let them know where we are!" Remus said.

"Who?"

"Lily's friends." James replied.

"Oh yeah, they were asking about you."

"Don't you think it might look a bit suspicious for you to be talking to a car?" Sirius asked her.

"Not as suspicious as hearing the car answer back." Lily said, standing on the other side of the car. "Why are you down there?"

"Well, we were about to sneak off to the bathroom until you all decided to come and talk to us and spoil our brilliant cover." Sirius said.

"Sitting in the shadow of a car under brightly colored beach towels, oh yes, brilliant, ingenious cover!" Lily rolled her eyes. "You look like a trio of kindergarteners who just spilled juice and are hoping that the teacher won't find out."

"Not to mention ridiculous." Alice added.

"Well, if one of you would move, we would be safely on our way to the bathroom!" Sirius said.

"Under towels?" Lily asked.

"Yes."

"That wouldn't look strange at all. Three grown wizards sneaking off under towels." Lily said sarcastically.

"Do you have a better idea?" Sirius asked.

"How about if I told you that my friends left?"

"They did?" Sirius and Remus asked excitedly.

"Yep."

"How did you get them to leave?" Remus asked.

"I told them that you and Sirius were in a dreadful car accident, leaving your once-handsome faces absolutely disfigured and that you didn't want them to see you like that." Lily said.

"Aww Lily, you do love us." Sirius stood and gave her a hug.

"Padfoot, get your disgusting paws off my fiancée." James snapped.

"Sorry mate, she's just so pretty." Sirius smiled innocently.

"Thank you Sirius, but you're all sweaty." Lily grimaced, pushing him away. James smiled with satisfaction and put his arm around Lily.

"He's sweaty too." Sirius pointed out.

"But I don't smell like dog." James pointed out.

"Neither do I." Sirius said. As one, Lily, James, and Remus raised their eyebrows at him. "How do you all do that at once? It's kind of weird."

"Never you mind Padfoot, never you mind." James told him.

The day continued. Sirius was pleased to discover once they were done that they had indeed made a fair sum of money.

"If we keep going like this, we'll only need a few more jobs!" He said happily.

"Joy." Remus said, not thrilled to hear that the Muggle job-fest was not over.

"And I was hoping we would be toiling like this until the day we died." A sunburned James said sarcastically.

"Aren't we kind of running out of Muggle jobs?" Remus asked hopefully.

"We're not that lucky Moony." James told him. "What do you have in mind Padfoot?"


	9. Employed by Arthur Weasley

"Excuse me, can you boys please tell me where I can buy a purse?"

Sirius, James, and Remus pointed to their right, all with the same terrified expression on their faces.

"Thank you." The person followed their directions.

"Padfoot, I never expected to say this, but I think that this is my least favorite job so far." Remus said.

"Was that a guy or a girl?" A shocked Sirius asked, not acknowledging Remus' comment.

"I don't know, but I'm scared." James said timidly. None of them knew how to respond when the large person who at first they thought to be a rather unfortunate woman approached them, but they soon discovered that they had been mistaken.

"Did you boys see another cockroach? Or was it a puffskein?" Lily joked, coming up to them.

"No Dear, it was more along the lines of a cross dresser." James told her, matter-of-factly.

"Who?" Lily asked.

"That bloke, right over there." Sirius indicated the person.

"Isn't that Dung?" Lily asked.

"No, he's over there…with the jewelry and stuff…" Sirius trailed off, wondering what he had been thinking, letting Dung take over that department.

Lily gasped. "Oh Merlin, I thought that was him! When he asked me where the purses were, I told him not to be a wise-aleck and to get back to work!" The boys all started laughing.

"Way to go Lils!" Sirius said through his laughter.

"Oh, I'm so embarrassed! I can't believe I did that!"

"It's ok Sweetie, don't worry about it. You'll never see him…her…that person again." James told her.

"I think I'm going to go away now." Lily said timidly. James kissed her on top of the head and she walked back to her work station. As soon as she had left, a tall, thin, red-headed man approached them.

"Are you three in charge?" He asked.

"Yes sir." Sirius replied. "I'm Sirius Black, and these are my co-workers, James Potter and Remus Lupin."

"I'm Arthur Weasley and I work for the Misuse of Muggle Arts Office at the Ministry."

"Oh…" The boys exchanged glances, wondering if they had done something wrong. "Is there a problem Sir?" Remus asked.

"Not at all. It's just my job to come to any sales where Wizard-owned items are being sold to make sure that they're safe to sell to Muggles."

"Oh, ok." Sirius said, sounding relieved.

"Out of curiosity, why would three young Wizards such as yourselves be so keen to have a Muggle garage sale?" Mr. Weasley asked.

"We are trying to expand our horizons and-"

"He wants a motorcycle." Remus interrupted Sirius.

"Yeah." Sirius said.

"And he thinks that they best way to get one is to make his best friends work their bums off so that he can buy one." James finished. Mr. Weasley laughed.

"So you boys are trying to make some Muggle money."

"Yes, and it's proving to be a bit less than pleasurable." James said.

"Well, if you boys are interested, I have…one, two, three…five boys at home, and my wife and I haven't had a chance to get out of the house and just spend time together for a long time."

"We accept!" Sirius exclaimed before James and Remus could say anything.

"Great! How about this Friday at 5?"

"Excellent!" Sirius said enthusiastically while James and Remus mouthed wordlessly.

"Alright! See you then!" Mr. Weasley said cheerfully before walking away.

"Oh no, Sirius. No, no, no, no, NO! No more baby sitting!" James said loudly.

"Didn't you hear him? There are _5 of them_. And they're all _wizards_." Remus told him. "Besides, Friday is impossible for me. My condition you know…"

"Nice try Moony, but full moon was last Tuesday." Sirius said.

"Darn it." Remus said, hoping that Sirius had forgotten.

"Besides we can use magic on them and we don't have to worry about getting in trouble." Sirius said.

"No, we are NOT using magic on any little kids because we are NOT going to help you baby sit again!" James cried.


	10. Little Weasleys!

"Thank you so much for coming. Arthur and I haven't had time just for us in so long, especially since the twins were born." Molly Weasley told Sirius, James, and Remus.

"Did you hear that Sirius? They have _twins_." James said with a smile, though Sirius knew he was actually saying, _I hate you Padfoot_.

"Yes, but don't worry, they aren't too much trouble. They're only 9 months old. Just keep an eye on them because they've taken a liking to breaking and climbing on things. You can have Bill help you watch them. He's pretty good with all his brothers, unless he gets into one of his rebellious moods, but that usually only happens when you try and tell him to take a bath or something and you won't have to worry about that. They've all been bathed and fed, but they can snack if they want. They don't really have a bedtime; they usually fall asleep on their own. Let's see, what else? Oh, don't let Charlie go out and fly. He'll tell you he's allowed to, but he's not. Percy will probably just keep to himself the whole time. Though he may start bombarding you with questions about Hogwarts. If they get bored, just play a game or something, but nothing that could result in a broken bone or anything. Bill is a big fan of Wizard's Chess and Percy is becoming one. Charlie will want to know anything you can tell him about Quidditch, so just start talking about something like that and they'll be happy for ages. If you need us for any reasons, you can Floo us and we'll Apparate right home. Now, do you have any questions?"

Sirius, James, and Remus shook their heads, each feeling a bit overwhelmed.

"Wonderful! I suppose you would like to meet the boys. Hey boys, will you all come here please?" She called. In a few moments, 3 boys with fiery red hair, freckles, and bright blue eyes came into the room. "Ok, this is Bill; he's 7, the oldest. He needs a haircut." She indicated the tallest boy. He was skinny with hair falling all over the place. "This is Charlie, he's 5." She indicated the second boy who was shorter than and not as skinny as Bill. "And, this is Percy. He's almost 3."

"It's a pleasure to meet you." Percy, who was the shortest of the 3, said with the air of one getting ready for a business conference.

"It's nice to meet you too." Sirius said, a little taken aback at the child's maturity.

"Ok boys, this is Sirius, Remus, and James. They're going to stay with you tonight while Daddy and I go out and have a good time."

"Can they do magic?" Charlie asked.

"Yes they can, so that means you can't shrink them and lock them inside the clock." Mrs. Weasley told her sons.

"Excuse me?" James asked.

"Oh, last time we tried to go out, Arthur arranged for Muggle baby sitters, Heaven knows why, and the boys got a little carried away." She eyed her children.

"Well, when we tried to baby sit Muggle kids they locked us in a closet, so it's all good." Sirius said.

"Sirius, you pretty much just gave them the impression that we're a bunch of weaklings." Remus told him.

"So where are the twins?" James asked Molly. As if on cue, a crash sounded from the next room.

"FRED! GEORGE!" They heard Mr. Weasley yelling, followed by two high pitched screams. Seconds later, two shorter red heads came running into the room, laughing hysterically. They hid behind their mother's legs and peeked out from either side, excited, identical grins plastered on each face. Mr. Weasley came rushing into the room.

"Hello boys. Hope you're not too scared yet." He said.

"Not at all. We're Gryffindors through and through!" Sirius said.

"Except for when it comes to Muggle children." Remus said.

"Or puffskein." James added.

"Or cockroaches."

"Or-"

"Thank you Prongs and Moony." Sirius snapped, cutting them off. Arthur and Molly both laughed.

"Well, Gryffindors are always welcome." Molly said. "Arthur and I both were Gryffindors."

"Excellent." Sirius said.

"You know Sirius, I'm a bit surprised at your being a Gryffindor. Didn't you say that you were a Black?" Arthur asked.

"Yeah…" Sirius said. "But don't worry, I haven't seen any member of my family for over 3 years. I've been disowned since I was a little kid and from that day on wanted nothing to do with them."

"That's good. I think we're related somehow…second cousins perhaps…" Arthur said.

"I thought the name Weasley sounded familiar. Being a pureblood and all, it's kind of hard not to be related to a lot of people." Sirius replied.

"True indeed." Arthur agreed. "Well, I think we best be getting off. I hope you all have fun together. Boys, you all behave, and help Sirius and his friends take care of Fred and George."

"We will." Bill, Charlie, and Percy responded as one. Fred and George screamed again at the sound of their names, their faces still bearing huge grins.

"Well, good night my sweethearts." Molly kissed all her children. "Good luck." She told James, Sirius, and Remus before she and Arthur headed out the door.

"So…" Sirius said to the 5 kids who were all staring expectantly up at them. "Hi."

A chorus of "Hi" responded. Fred and George screamed.

"What's wrong with them?" A startled Remus yelled.

"Nothing! They do that all the time!" Bill yelled back at him.

"Why?" James shouted.

"How should I know?" Bill cried as Fred and George stopped screaming and grinned excitedly up at their new baby-sitters.

"I think that screaming is how they communicate, since they don't really know how to talk yet." Percy explained.

"PER-PER!" Fred or George yelled.

"PER-PER!" The other echoed.

"What's Per-Per?" Sirius asked.

"That's what they call Percy." Bill told them.

"How do you tell them apart?" Remus asked.

"Well, if you look really closely, Fred has this scar on his left cheek. But it doesn't really matter. The both respond to each other's names. Watch. George!" Bill said. Both twins' heads snapped towards Bill.

"BIW!" They cried out.

"Ok, so you're Biw, you're Per-Per, who are you?" Sirius asked Charlie.

"I think I'm Chaw-ie." Charlie said.

"CHAW-IE!" Fred and George yelled.

"Yep, that's it." Charlie said. He looked up at them. "I'm going to go out and ride my broom."

"Oh no you're not." James said.

"Yes I am. I'm allowed to." Charlie told him.

"No you're not. Your mummy already told us." Sirius said.

"But Daddy says I'm allowed to."

"No, he doesn't." Sirius replied.

"You know Charlie, I was Seeker on the Gryffindor Quidditch team." James told him.

"You were?" The child gasped with wide eyes. "I'm gonna be a Seeker!"

"Aw, not a Beater?" Sirius asked.

"No. Fred and George can be Beaters because they like to hit things. And I'm gonna be Captain."

"Sounds like you've got this all planned out." James said.

"Yep."

"How about the rest of you?" Remus asked.

"I'm going to be Head Boy." Percy said excitedly.

"Well, I wasn't Head Boy, but I was a Prefect."

"Really?" Percy looked up at Remus with admiration.

"Yeah."

"How come you weren't Head Boy?" Percy asked.

"I had some things come up that just didn't allow it." Remus said.

"Oh."

"Your mum tells us that you like playing Wizards Chess." Remus changed the subject.

"Yeah! It's the best!" Bill piped up.

"Bill's trying to teach me, but he's not doing a very good job." Percy looked accusingly at his older brother.

"I can teach you. I've played since I was 3." Remus offered.

"Cool!" Percy smiled.

"I want to play against you. You're probably a lot better than my dad!" Bill said.

"Remus could beat anyone in chess." Sirius told Bill. "He's quite literally a Chess Wizard." The Weasley boys smiled. Fred and George screamed again. James, Sirius, and Remus jumped. "How often do they do that?"

"Whenever they feel like it. It changes every day." Bill said.

"They seem to be happy kids." Remus said.

"Yeah, they're always really happy." Bill said.

"They're just loud!" Charlie said dramatically.

"I bet that if James and Sirius had met before they could talk, that's how they would have been." Remus told them.

Baby sitting the Weasley boys turned out to be a lot better than baby sitting Muggle kids. All things seemed to go rather smoothly, and even enjoyably for a while. James had Charlie mesmerized with tales of Quidditch, Remus and Bill spent their time playing Chess and teaching Percy to play, and Sirius kept an eye on the twins, who were laughing at his silliness.

About an hour later, the Weasley boys started complaining of hunger, so Sirius decided to make everyone some popcorn. After the boys were happily settled with their popcorn, James told Sirius, "You know, I didn't expect to say this, but I'm having a good time."

"Yeah." Remus agreed. "I'm actually really glad you took this job, Sirius."

"I knew you guys would appreciate me someday." Sirius said with satisfaction.

"Wait a second." James said suddenly. He knew that all this was too good to last. "I see those 3. Where are Fred and George?" Sirius and Remus paled.

"Oh no." Remus muttered.

"Hey guys?" Sirius asked the boys. They turned their blue eyes on him. "Where are the twins?"

"Hang on, where's my wand?" James gasped suddenly.

They all shrugged and turned their attention back to their popcorn. Suddenly, two loud screams sounded form upstairs. "Great." Sirius said as he, James, and Remus bounded upstairs. They stopped as they reached the bathroom, where a very happy Fred and George were looking at something in the toilet and laughing hysterically. "Fred! George!" The twins looked up at them and screamed with huge grins on their faces. "What are you doing?" He asked cautiously. They screamed again.

"Oh Merlin!" James gasped as he looked in the toilet. "That's my wand!" Fred and George screamed wildly, smiling as though it were Christmas. Sirius and Remus were once again doubled up laughing at James. "Oh Merlin, this is NOT funny!" He snapped at them. "Agh! Why do these things always happen to me?"

"Guess you're just lucky Prongs." Sirius gasped through his laughter.

"What happened?" Bill asked as he, Charlie, and Percy appeared in the doorway.

"You're little brothers just stuck my wand in the toilet!" James cried. The Weasley boys joined Sirius and Remus in their laughter. "Oh, I cannot believe this! This is disgusting! You two are horrible, mischievous little monsters! You two…" Sirius, Remus, and the Weasley boys stopped laughing to hear what James would say. "Are going to make us proud when you get to Hogwarts. I think we've found the heirs to the throne of…well…whatever throne we left behind."

"Yeah, too bad Filch confiscated our map. I think these two could have put it to good use." Sirius added.

"Well, maybe one day they'll find it." Remus said.

"What map?" Charlie asked. James, Sirius, and Remus looked at each other.

"It's story time." James said.

"Without the…er…finer details." Remus said, indicating his Lycanthropy.

"Right-o." Sirius said.

"And that is how the mighty Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs became the greatest troublemakers Hogwarts had ever seen. All thanks to their Invisibility Cloak and the Marauder's Map. The end." James concluded their story.

"Wow." Bill and Charlie said as one.

"Is that a true story?" Percy asked.

"Of course. We're living proof of that." Sirius said.

"So wait…that story was about you?" Bill asked.

"Yep." James told them. "I'm Prongs, the lucky one."

"I'm Padfoot, the cute one." Sirius said jokingly.

"I'm Moony, the mature one." Remus said.

"And the young one." James said with a smile.

"Who's Wormtail?" Percy asked.

"Our friend Peter. He's out of town at the moment…I think…" Sirius said.

"He's the dumb one." James said.

"Prongs…" Remus sent him a warning glance.

"Only joking Moony."

"Sure you were, Prongsie." Sirius said.

"Don't call me Prongsie."

"Prongsie!" Bill and Charlie giggled.

"Oh no! Look what you did!" James accused Sirius.

_Hey guys! Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed it and I hope I didn't make any dumb mistakes, though I'm sure I did. Please forgive me. Happy September!_

_Love, Peace, and Pirates – Midnight Paradise_


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